El Mañana: Inside the Minds
by Anarchist Angel
Summary: What exactly was going through the minds of all the Gorillaz members after the El Mañana accident? This is a brief summary of what probably went through their minds. I admit it's not my best work.
1. Chapter 1

Russel

I couldn't take it anymore. The thought of her dead tore me up inside. She had been the only angel in my life to help me keep control of these demons inside me. I try to hide my feelings inside. Someone has to be responsible for the band, but I failed. Noodle was so young and innocent, but now she's gone. I remember the El Mañana freshly from just a few days ago.

The video was never supposed to happen that way. The island was not supposed to crash. I don't even know where the ships came from and yet I felt like I should have done something. My baby-girl, she's gone. Why did it have to be her. She never did anything to deserve dying such a death. She was happy on the island, but there seemed to be a hint of doubt. It was if she knew what was going to happen. Could Noodle have known her demise? No. Couldn't be. The island just dropped out of the sky and I remember watching fire engulf the windmill in minutes. Poor Noodle. No where to hide.

Her last thoughts must've been full of fear. Why couldn't I have done something? No one has been able to find her body yet. She. She's without any trace. I want to believe she's alive, but the island was bombed and everything. Who would commit such a murder to young Noodle.

The memories of us in 19/2000 and such were some of the best. She was so happy and I always wanted to be there for her. Her innocence was precious. These days the purity of the mind is a rare thing. It was all lost in that moment.

The face of sheer horror was revealed as she plummeted from the sky. Why? And those corporate bastards aired the video because they said it'd increase the ratings. Why? How could they?

I got up from my bed. It was 5pm, but time didn't matter anymore. Nothing did. I hadn't talked to anyone since the accident. I wish I could've saved her. She's dead.

2D

'Ay took da 'ole container of painkillers, but it couldn't kill the emotional pain. 'Ay jus' felt num. Poor Noodle. She was my friend, my best and closest friend. 'Ay can barely remember all da' detail right now, but probably cause of da' pills. No wait, ets coming back. She was on the flying island just enjoying herself making the video. It was supposed to be an calm upbeat song, but den dese planes and copters came by shooting at da' windmill. Noodle ran fo' comfort inside, but they continued attacking.

Dare were several cameras getting different angles. When 'ay dought tinks couldn't get any worse dey did. 'Ay saw her screaming as the windmill came crashing down. My heart broke at dat moment. The island hit da ground and den got bombed. Dare was no way she could 'ave survived. 'ow did dis happen?

Da pills don't 'elp and 'ay keep 'aving nightmares of da accident over and over. My sorrows 'ave worked passed the drugs. 'Ay wish 'ay could 'ave been in da mindmill wit 'er. At least den 'ay could 'ave stayed wit 'er. 'Ay don't want to be alive anymo'. Wot's da point now? She completed the band.

We played video games togeter. She was da only band member who dint pick on me and she made me feel like 'ay actually mattered. Everyone else used me because 'ay was famous or dey liked my voice. Dat dint matter to Noodle, but now she's gone. Dare's no one left to care.

Dare's no more pills. Otherwise 'ay would join her...

Murdoc

Honestly, I have no clue where Noodle is. She was helping me get rid of Jimmy. He was becoming a problem. I saw Noodle jump off the island just in time, but I don't know what happened. Wot if she didn't make it though? 'Ay still 'ave to go look fo' her. Part of me thinks she is alive, but another part of me doesn't quite know.

Noodle was so talented and if I lost her the band would be screwed. I mean she is the guitarist after all. Still I feel like maybe this plan was not thought through completely. Russel and 2D have no idea about wot I planned with the producers. I know Russel would 'ave my head if he found out and the dullard can't keep a bloody in the meantime I am not really sure where Noodle is or wot. Hopefully, shes okay. She's no dullard and can take care of herself. Right?...

Noodle

I have been wandering around the remains of the island for several days now. Why did no one come for me? Murdoc, you promised me you'd get me. I helped you get rid of Jimmy. Was he trying to get rid of me too? What if he was? I miss everyone. Will he tell them I'm gone? Will I see the band again?

I feel so weak. I haven't eaten in 2, 3? I don't know. Between the hunger and the bruises from my parachute almost failing until the last second costed me. I had floated to close the explosion as well. My eye hurts so much. Why did I agree to this stunt? Maybe it's because I was trying to be a closer friend to Murdoc. I saw the way he treated 2D. I didn't want to be treated like that, but still.

Gorillaz was my family. Murdoc was like my crazy, drunk uncle. Russel my big brother. And 2D my best friend and other crazy uncle. Why'd I give up being with my family. Did I really want to escape from the fame this badly? I can't help, but wander around the ruins of the island hoping they'd come and look for me.

Remembering the incident was crazy. I was terrified the whole time. I can't believe I even made it. I just did what Damon told me to do. Then I jumped out with the parachute. I pulled the cord, but it wasn't working. By a miracle it worked, but a wind blew my close to the island as the bomb came down. It shot a piece of burning debris at my eye. I remember screaming loudly, but there was no one to hear me.

2D and Russel used to kiss my scratches and injuries away, but no one was here to help me. No one to wipe away my tears. I'm alone now and I don't think they're coming. No one is coming. If they would have come it would have been by now. There is never going to be anyone to come. Why didn't they look for me? Was it because I wasn't good enough for the band?

I shouldn't even stay and wait. I don't need them. I'll find my own way. The whole band could just... just... I can't believe they didn't come. So this is what being forgotten feels like. I'm all alone. Left here to be forgotten and fade away like the memory of this island. I guess it's time for me to go now. Where I don't know, but there isn't any reason to come back. It's not like anyone cares. I don't even think I care where I go. I guess deep inside I care as little for myself as they did or do. I don't know anymore...


	2. Chapter 2

**When I got to the end of the El Mañana story, I realized I couldn't end it there. I figured what was Noodle doing that whole time she was missing?**

I wandered away for several days. I had to eat nuts, grass, and whatever I could find. How unfortunate I had to land in the middle of nowhere, but at least the Japanese government trained me to survive in cases like this.

I couldn't help, but feel haunted by leaving my band members behind. Part of me really wanted to go back, but I knew I couldn't. It was a strong battle between my heart and mind. My mind had won, but only the battle. I looked at my phone and it was about to die. No messages, missed calls, or even a signal. There hasn't been any for a while.

I had lost all feeling in my arms and legs. They were numb except for my aching feet. My fingers were cold from bad circulation and I guess I hadn't been getting enough nutrients because I felt like I was floating.

My fingers were shaking and refused to cooperate with the rest of me. My feet followed in the rebellion. I looked ahead to the large rocky hills and sighed in defeat. I couldn't keep going, but my feet kept dragging. I coached myself to keep going as I felt my spirit try to fight as if it was trying to leave my body. My feet were like anchors to the rest of the body. My heart was working on hyperdrive and beating as if it was about to explode from my chest. I found myself breathing super hard trying to get myself to keep moving.

Why did they leave me here? Don't they know I'm still alive? They probably just assumed I died. I wonder if they would come if they knew I was struggling right now. Please come and get me guys. I need you guys. You were my friends. I loved all of you so much. You were my family...

At that moment I felt the rest of my energy escape my body completely and it went dark...

I had woken up, but in the hospital. A nurse turned to me and smiled. She called a doctor in. He looked about 40 and it seemed that being a doctor was stressful since he had wrinkles and dark circles around his eyes. He closed in on me and checked my pulse and such.

"I'm suprised you made it," said the doctor.

"Doko desu ka?" I asked.

"What?" questioned the doctor.

"Oh sorry, I meant where am I? How'd I get here?"

"Some hikers found you lying on the ground. They said you had collapsed and they weren't sure how long you were there. I assume you fainted from not having enough glucose in your body. However, we were able to treat you quickly. However, you seem very young. Where are your parents?"

I paused for a moment. Parents? I never had parents. Any old memories I had were vague memories of being at that government facility. The Gorillaz had been the only family I've known, but they disowned me.

"Do you have any guardians?"

"No, I have no family."

The doctor nodded in concern. I felt tears form in my eyes. I have no family. I am unwanted. Where will I go? I began sobbing and feel hot tears run down my cheeks. The doctor felt sorry for me and patted my shoulder unsure what to do or say.

"I will call Diane in here," he said as he walked out.

Some blonde woman walked into the room about 10 minutes later. She was dressed in a black skirt and white blouse. In her hand was a clipboard and a pen. She sat in the chair by my bed and looked at me with a fake smile.

"Hello, I'm Diane, I am one of the social workers who work here and I want to ask a few questions," the woman said.

"Like what?" I asked with a skeptical tone.

"Well Dr. Johnson said that you mentioned not having any guardians. We have some concerns."

"Alright."

"What is your full name?"

"I am Noodle."

"Noodle?"

"Hai."

"Last name?"

"I don't have one. I'm just Noodle."

"Oh... How old are you? What's your birthday?"

"I'm 13, I was born October 31, 1990."

"Where did you come from?"

I thought for a second. If I told her about where I really came from, she may send me back. I lied.

"London."

"You have a strange accent for being in London."

"Well I spent a lot of time with immagrints and tourists."

"Uh huh... I see. Well, do you have any family or friends you can stay with?"

"Nope."

"This is very distressing. You will have to come with me then. We will find you a foster family."

Diane left for a while and talked to Dr. Johnson in the hallway. Diane came back in the room and told me I would have to go with her. I followed her into her car. I was not sure where I was going, but where else would I go? I sat in the back and looked out the window as I watched the buildings flash past me.

"Are you comfortable?" asked Diane.

"I'm fine," I answered.

"It's not too hot or cold. I can turn on the heat or AC."

"No, I'm okay."

The car stopped in front of a huge building. It looked like a school, but it was an orphanage. Diane and I got out of the car and she led me in. I got a change of clothes, a meal, and was assigned a room and a bed. There was another girl in there who was really different from me. Her name was Cheryl. She was a brunette who loved to talk, but I wasn't in the mood.

"What's your name? I'm Cheryl. You look familiar. Do you like music? I like music. My favorite band is Gorillaz."

I perked up. As annoying as she was, she had piqued my interest. I turned to Cheryl who was twisted a strand of hair. I turned to her.

"I like music," I said quietly.

"Do you like Gorillaz?"

"Yeah, they're okay."

"Who's your favorite member? I like the little boy. You know the one who plays the guitar."

She thought I was a little boy? I felt the agitation come back to me, but I figure I should play along. If she thought I was a boy it could make it easier to blend in. I may as well take a crack at living a normal life.

"I like 2D," I answered.

"Which one is that?"

"The tall, skinny one with the blue hair."

"Ohhh. That's cool."

"How long will I be here."

"'Til you get adopted."

I sighed and layed on my bed. Cheryl went to a crappy old computer in the room and went on youtube. I heard a familiar song and looked up. The El Mañana was playing. Somehow the music video was uploaded to youtube. I watched the video with her. There were so many hits on the video.

"Wait? The little boy is a girl?" said Cheryl in a shocked tone.

"I guess so," I smirked to myself.

"But I had a crush on him er her," she whined.

I started laughing and fell off the bed. Cheryl turned to me and then back at the screen.

"You look just like her though," Cheryl began to analyze.

I panicked. If she knew it was me I would have to leave. She couldn't know that I was part of Gorillaz. We continued watching the video and she watched my 'demise'. I heard Cheryl start to whimper at the fact that I died in the video.

"They killed her. How could that happen?" yelled Cheryl outrage.

"I know how you feel..." I whispered.


	3. Chapter 3

I would believe Cheryl was Satan him/herself? because I was driven close to madness. After finding out that I was dead she was outraged. Apparently a lot of fans were not happy about my 'death'. All she talked about was how much I was her favorite member and she wanted her back so badly. The news covered the accident and people made memorial youtube videos and wrote fanfics that said what they thought happened or what may happened or idk. At first I felt honored by all the attention by the fans and I wondered how the rest of the band felt about it.

Did Murdoc regret pulling this stunt? Did the other guys miss me? I knew Murdoc would never reveal his stunt to them lest he hated his own testicles. I knew that I regreted agreeing to that video.

Cheryl played music videos of all the Gorillaz songs and played the DARE music video and tried to dance along, but looked like Murdoc when he had too much to drink. I myself tried to not dance along to the music or sing along. Her friends came in the room and one commented saying Noodle was her favorite member. One of them looked at me and mentioned I looked just like her.

"I said the same thing," commented Cheryl.

"Nu uh," said the other friend.

"Why not?" questioned the first.

"Well, Noodle doesn't have that huge ugly scar on her face," answered the second girl.

The rest of the girls gasped.

"That was uncalled for," commented Cheryl.

"It's okay," I said as I left the room.

I walked to the bathroom and I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I have never seen this mark on my face before. I hadn't paid attention to it. It was ugly. I was ugly. The band wouldn't want me back as long as I looked like this. My heart shattered as I looked at my disfigured face. I began to cry. I was an unloved person who would probably not get adopted. Would I ever be loved for more than a musician? It came to my attention that people are loved for what they do or by accomplishments. I glared at my reflection with animosity.

"I hate you!" I screamed at my reflection as I punched the mirror, causing it to shatter in a million pieces.

"Oh my gosh," Cheryl said as she entered the room.

I looked at her with my misplaced aggression and held a clenched fist up. It was bleeding from bits of glass in my knuckles. Cheryl ran out of the bathroom and I heard her footsteps flee down the hall in terror. I looked down to find myself in failure only to see a million more of my horrid reflections staring at my with distaste.

A social worker ran into the bathroom to find me in a tearful rage in the bathroom. She grabbed my fists and tried to assure me everything would be okay. I finally calmed down and had to spend the night in a separate bedroom from Cheryl because they feared me as hostile. The next day I was sent to a foster home.

The name of the couple who adopted me were Jenna Hobkins and Frank Hobkins. They both loved music so I was able to settle down for a few years. I still went through issues of my own for a long time. They loved me the best they could, but I could never call it my own because I wasn't myself there. What was better though was they never listened to Gorillaz since they were old-fashioned, but it meant I didn't have to hide my real identity.

"Noodle, I got you a present," said Jenna.

Jenna loved traveling and had just returned from a long trip to Japan. She was there on business and she had a box for me. It reminded me of home and I was excited I had to say. Jenna was more of a big sister than a mother. I grabbed the box and opened it. It was an Oni mask.

"I thought it was you," Jenna said.

"I love it," I answered.

Jenna was right. It was me. The mask seemed to capture who I felt I was like. I put the mask on my face. Jenna was suprised that I wore it. I suppose she expected me to hang it in my room or something. However, I began wearing it all the time. It became my face. I was ridiculed for wearing it at school and eventually dropped out and started being homeschooled. I wasn't meant to fit in with regular people I suppose. I was different and I still struggled with that.

Jenna and Frank didn't know much about who I really was and with my mask I felt a new sense of power. I went out walking every night and lurked into the dark streets of my town. I always liked to wander into the bad neighborhoods because there was a sense of danger and adventure. I always ended up in this one graveyard and would just sit there. I was brought to peace there. It reminded me of Kong Studios. I could never forget the band and I always kept up to date with what the band was doing.

That night was different. I found myself just thinking of 2D and began to cry. I missed him the most because he was my best friend. I began to feel sick and I lifted my mask to find the grave digger looking at me.

"Luv, how many time do I 'ave to tell ya' to stay out of here!" scolded the man.

Let me just mention that I've gotten in lots of trouble here by the same guy for about 2 years now. I smiled, but he could not tell and began swearing. I stood up and pulled the fag from his mouth and began smoking it as I walked away. The mask was still covering my face, but I was still smoking. I heard him swearing and throw his shovel on the ground. He always hated how I did that.

Anyway I still felt lonely and I knew I never felt that way when I was in the band. Living a 'normal' life was not for me so I decided tonight would be my last night here and I headed back home. Jenna and Frank smelt the tobacco off of me and checked me for anything else, but found nothing as usual.

"Noodle, smoking kills!" yelled Frank.

I walked to my room silently and layed on my bed and waited for them to fall asleep.

Around 1A.M. I began packing my stuff. I took my laptop and melodica that I got for my birthday. I wrote a note for Frank and Jenna before I left.

_Jenna and Frank,_

_Thanks for everything, but I don't feel like I can prosper here anymore. Don't feel guilty for my departure and I thank you for rasing me as your own. I hope one day we may meet again. _

_Noodle_

I left the note on my bed and climbed out the window. I ran down the road and began my journey to find myself...


	4. Chapter 4

I ran quickly as far as I could before running out of breath and forced to start walking. I panted as I lugged my stuff. A car passed by and then stopped. The window rolled down and I saw a hand gesture for me to come over. I hesitated, but I walked over in a state of curiousity. It was a man in his mid-twenties at the wheel. He gave a smile.

"Meow," teased the man.

I stood there unsure how to respond so I chose not to.

"Need a ride, hun?" the man asked with a grin.

I nodded shyly and walked to the passenger's side unsure if this was even a good idea. I didn't know who he was or what he was capable of. I strapped myself in and looked at him.

"I've never met a woman like yourself, but hey I'll try anything once. Back to my place," said the man.

I froze in my seat. the man must've thought I was a prostitute. Did this guy think even know that I was only 16? He pulled out a carton of fags and held it out to me. I grabbed one and put it in my mouth. He lit it with his zippo and I took long drags and tried to calm down. The man was smoking a fag and steered calmly. He turned on the radio and bobbed his head to the music. Finally, we pulled up into the driveway of some rundown house.

We got out of the car and went into his house. It was a total mess and I felt myself getting sick. The man removed his shirt and threw it on the couch. I had brought my stuff with me and was shaking in axiety. The man wasn't bad looking, but I had absolutely no interest in doing anything. He could be my dad! He struuted towards me and lifted my mask slowly in excitement. His smile melted into a face of shock.

"Shit! You're a teenage girl!" screamed the man as my mask hit the floor.

I stumbled to get my mask and quickly put it on to hide my shameful face. He quickly grabbed his shirt and struggled to put it on.

"Listen, I'm... s-so sorry I didn't know," he stammered as he pulled his wallet out.

He handed me 40 pounds while he sweated bullets.

"Here's 40 pounds if you promise to keep quiet about this mess," he said as he pushed me through the door.

Before I could even respond the door was slammed in my face. I looked at the money in my hand and put it in my pocket. I guess that would be helpful to have. I kept walking unsure where I was going. I ended up spending the night sleeping on a bench at the bus stop. I awoke the next morning to the bus stopping there. I got on the bus and had the money to ride.

The bus took me to London my supposed hometown. That's where I told Diane I was from. I got off the bus and thought to myself and wondered if this was where I would find myself. Maybe it was time to embrace my new identity.

The first thing I did in London was looked for a job. I lied completely about my identity and managed to get a job at a coffee shop. We agreed that if I worked at the shop without any monetary pay they would let me live in the guest room they had. I agreed to these terms. It worked well for me for a while since I could live under the radar practically.

One day I was working in the coffee shop and there is always music playing in the shop. I then heard a familiar melody. It was _Faust _by my old band. I was pouring coffee and stopped suddenly. I served the coffee to a customer sitting at one of the tables. He looked at me. Then sipped his coffee.

"Is something wrong sir?" I asked.

"Um it's nothing. This song reminds me of someone I knew," said the man.

I began singing the lyrics near the end of the song.

"shigoto no ato ni me ga sameru

nani ka shinakucha

shigoto no ato ni

shigoto no ato ni me ga sameru

nani ka shinakucha

shigoto no ato ni

shigoto no ato ni me ga sameru

nanika chinakucha

shigoto no atoni," I sang.

The man looked at me with an astounded look on his face. He stood up and looked at my face. It then hit me who the man was.

"Noodle?" said Damon.


	5. Chapter 5

"Shhh," I said with a finger to my lips.

The chances of me running into Damon must have been slim. I saw my hands visibly shaking and was not sure how to react. My shift was almost over and I asked him to wait about 20 minutes. He nodded and drank his coffee.

At the end of my shift I sat in the chair next to him. WE were both awkwardly looking at each other. He must've been as shocked as I was.

"Noodle what happened?" was Damon's first question.

"What do you mean?" I asked. Did he mean in the video or all these years?

"You disappeared after the video. No one could find you. Murdoc said he went looking for you, but never found you."

"Believe me he never came for me. Kind of a harsh way to say you're fired."

"Noodle, I don't think you understand. The band completely fell apart without you there. Murdoc said it himself before he well kind of disappeared."

"What happened to Russel and 2D?"

"They went home. Haven't heard from them in a while. Man, I can't wait to tell everyone you're okay, but what happened to you?"

"I landed near the crashsite, but no one came. Murdoc said he would, but never did. I wandered away and collapsed in the wilderness only to be found by hikers who brought me to the clinic. I was in a foster home for 2 years, but left and now am working here under the table."

"Noodle, I am so sorry about all this. You must've had a hard time on your own like this. We need to get the band back together now that you're here and okay. Everyone will be so happy, but how will we do it? I know we can say Murdoc dragged you from Hell and-"

"NO!"

"What is it?"

"I don't want to be in the band anymore. I could see how little I mean to everyone. I'm just a gimick. My death and my resurrection will just be a gimick. Screw the band. I'm finding my own way."

"Noodle, do you think there may be a reason I found you at this coffee shop?"

"Listen, I don't know why I just want to live my own life now. And don't tell anyone I'm here."

"Alright, but if you change your mind here's my number and contact information."

He handed me his business card and left the shop. I was so fustrated and upset I was not sure exactly how I felt. However, there was a bit of regret. I went up to my room on the second floor. My mixed feelings had worked into a rage that I was unable to control. I threw random stuff in my room and started punching the wall. I busted a hole through the wall and had to move the dresser a few inches to the left to cover it. I could only hear myself panting as beads of sweat dripped from my brow.

Usually, when I reached this point of axiety I knew this meant it was time for me to move again. It did seem like I was running, but I would have to find myself eventually. I wish I could find myself and had a friend to talk to. Then it hit me. Mr. Kyuzo was always a great listener. If I could talk to him. I began to pack and had money from tips which I shouldn't have been receiving. Again I had left without a trace, but this time I had an idea where I was going.

I took a boat to Japan to the city of Osaka. After talking to a few people I was given Mr. Kyuzo's location. He was still alive and in his humble home meditating.

I approached him with caution.

"Noodle, I can't believe after all these years!" Mr. Kyuzo exclaimed.

I can't believe he was able to recognize me without me removing my mask.

"Sensei, I need some advice," I said as I bowed my head.


	6. Chapter 6

"What is it, Noodle?" Mr. Kyuzo with a face of question and concern.

"Sensei, you have helped me early in my life in so many ways, and I am thankful for all of it," I began.

Mr. Kyuzo nodded as I spoke.

"I have been so confused lately. I've been trying to find myself after being separated from the band all this time. I don't know if you heard what happened."

"I heard and I suspected they would have trouble getting you. I am suprised you made it though. You were always very clever, but what's this about you being unsure about who you are?"

"I just want to find my identity separate from being a member of the band."

"Noodle, do you remember the first time you came to see me?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Everytime I tried to address you by your original name you corrected me and finally said that your name was Noodle and you were the guitarist of the Gorillaz. You were a part of them and they were a part of you."

"That was when I was little though."

"Yes, but you were a lot more sure who you were then than now. You are hiding in a disguise. Who are you hiding from?"

I touched my mask and thought for a minute. Wasn't I hiding from the crowd? The poparazzi? Fans? Who was I hiding from?

"Everyone?"

"No, Noodle you are hiding from yourself. What are you hiding? Why don't you want to be seen?"

"I had an injury from the video. It never healed. I rather not have anyone look at it including myself."

Mr. Kyuzo nodded in a caring and understanding way. He lifted my chin and looked at me with compassion.

"Noodle, I hope one day you will find the courage to come again as who you really are. Just like the catipillar hides in its cacoon before it emerges as a beautiful butterfly, you hide in your cacoon. I know when you find your true self it will be truely beautiful."

"I...don't understand."

"Noodle, you are not going to find yourself and will need time to grow, but when it's time to emerge where do you want to be?"

"I don't know; that's why I'm here."

"What are you really here to ask me?"

"Who am I?"

"That is your claim, but you and I both that is not the only reason if it is not the true reason."

"I guess I need to know where I need to emerge."

"Very clever Noodle. You have to confront your true self. You have been hiding from yourself and your destiny for too long. There is a reason you keep running into your past with the Gorillaz. Destiny finds us one way or another, Noodle. You want to find yourself? Confront your destiny. If you keep running from it then I'm afraid you will never find your true self. You have formed a bond with every single one of the band members and you cannot hide that any longer."

"Then why am I so angry? How could I go back after they forgot me?"

"I am sure that they did not forget you just the same way you were unable to forget them. Your frustrations with them will only cause you to get more lost. It is time to forgive Noodle."

I paused for a moment and bit my lip. Mr. Kyuzo was always wise and he was right. How long had I been angry with them? I decided it was time for me to return home to Kong Studios. I looked up at Mr. Kyuzo.

"Sensei?" I asked.

"Yes?" Mr. Kyuzo answered.

"Thank you for the advice. I know what I must do."

I bowed my head and turned to leave, but a small rock was thrown and almost hit me. Mr. Kyuzo had thrown it. I turned back in surprise. He had a smile on his face.

"Spend the night here Noodle-chan. I am sure it has been a long time since you had a good meal and a proper place to rest."

I bowed my head in sincere thanks and spent the night there. I would resume my travels in the morning.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay, let me just say that I am very happy because my fiance got me the Experience Edition of Plastic Beach. Totally, epic! Anyway that's about it.**

I arouse early the next day. It was nice to be able to be with an old friend. I wished I could just stay a little longer, but I had to leave. It was urgent that I reunite with the band. As long as we were apart I would not find my true self or my destiny. There were still so many questions that still had to be answered. I was dissatisfied with my uncertainty and where I was. The last few years have made me so bitter and unhappy.

I had made my bed and packed my bags. Mr. Kyuzo insisted that I eat breakfast. The meal was a traditional bowl of rice, miso, and tamagoyaki. I poured Mr. Kyuzo his tea. He smiled at me and I looked up wondering why.

"Sensei, why at is it?" I asked.

"You have grown up so much, Noodle," he smiled.

I don't know why, but I felt slightly embarassed when he said that. Luckily, he was unable to see my real expression through the mask. However, he could read my body language. I wore an awkward smile and my body tensed up. He chuckled slightly and quickly apologized and insisted he was not laughing at me. I was not offended and ate the last grain of rice off my plate.

"You know I hope I get to see your face when you emerge as a beautiful butterfly?" he said.

"Hai, Thank you sensei," I replied.

He smiled and I drank the last of my tea.

"Gochisōsama," I said as I bowed.

After breakfast I collected my belongings and left with a sad goodbye. I bowed to my sensei and was off on my journey. I had called Damon by a public phone in town. He said he would be able to get me a plane to Kong Studios, but it would take at least 2 days. I hung up a little concerned with where I would stay. I walked to the airport and sat on the bench there without any purpose for a while. I wondered if Kong Studios was still the same. What would my room be like?

I felt tears build in my eyes as I started to imagine what an intense moment it'd be like to reunite with everyone. I didn't know why, but I felt that very moment I was supposed to start playing my melodica. I pulled it out of my bag and began to play a random melody on it. The travelers around began to gather around me, but the more I played and got into the music itself the less I was aware of their presense.

I heard an applause, but it began to fade. My eyes fell heavy and as I played I had some kind of fantasy or vision. I saw ash and destruction. Was it Kong? Couldn't be. However, I felt something was wrong. I broke from my trance and pulled my lips from my instrument.

The tourists had given me money. Mostly, American tourists. Typical. I kept the money and ran into the airport with my belongings. I took the quickest flight to Essex. After hours of security and red tape I had made it on a plane.

The ride itself was pretty miserable. I was forced to sit next to some insensative prick who just said I wore a mask to cover my ugly face. The flight attendant came and asked me to remove my mask as it made other passengers nervous. I was hesitant about removing my mask, but did as I was told. The second my face was reveiled I felt the discomfort of the light in my eyes and heard a faint gasp from the attendant. The irritable boy sitting beside me began to scoff and laugh at my injury.

"I knew you were ugly," he roared in laughter.

I glared at the attendant in great hatred and remorse for my humiliation. I wore my mask for a reason and arouse from my seat before I did something I would regret to that boy. I took my mask with me. I tried to brush my hair in front of my eyes. That was the way I had worn it for years...before the accident. I hid in the plane lavatory and brushed my hair back. I looked at my reflection for the first time in years.

The scar was just a disgusting bruise that never really healed. More like a series of burns in some places. I touched the scar and frowned at myself. Would my bandmates accept me with my face like this? My right eye itself was red and puffy from the injury. What if I never emerge from my cacoon? Maybe going to Kong is just a mistake. Tears began to form in my eyes again. This was just a mistake. I wanted to punch my reflection, but the mirror was made of some kind of metal.

I hated myself so much. Why can't I just be beautiful? Why did I do that stupid stunt all those years back? Why did I agree to Murdoc's dirty work? Why am I so stupid? The self-loathing had became a more physical form. I dug my nails into my left arm until blood started to draw and I dragged my nails down to extend the paths for blood to escape.

The tears stopped rolling down my cheeks. It was like the tears were flowing in the form of blood and physical pain. I breathed deeply as I was soothed by the stinging pain. Then it hit me. It was my face that I had dispised all this time. It was the symbol of me. It was me I hated. I looked at my reflection and put my fingers to my face. I bug my nails into my face in a slow fight.

My body and brain were saying know and I felt my fingers try to fight from digging into my flesh. The body knew the pain that was about to take place. My heart took full control though and slowly forced my body to obey its commands. I felt the sting travel slowly with my nails as the skin was torn open in a crude fashion. Little bits of skin and drops of blood were caught under my nails. I washed my hands and looked up at the face I had successfully destroyed.

As blood dripped from my cheeks I felt triumphant for that moment. I smiled at my work and began to wash the blood off my face, arms, and hands. I covered my work with my mask and returned to my seat. Suprisingly, the boy was no longer sitting there.

I felt my eyes grow heavy. Today was a day full of woe and my misery and slowly rocked me to sleep...


	8. Chapter 8

I awoke many hours later and turned to the flight attendant. I asked her the time and she said it was 3pm EST. She pushed her cart down the aisle and I sighed as I looked out the window. Suprisingly, she did not ask me again to remove my mask. She probably felt awkward for that.

I sighed again and leaned on the armrest and looked at the clouds out the window. The plane was supposed to land in a few minutes. I fastened my seatbelt and daydreamed about Kong. It would a lot to adjust to. I wouldn't exactly just be able to adapt to it right away. I wonder if the place changed at all. The attendant announced the plane was landing and to fasten up.

The plane landed and I felt sick. Landing in a plane was just like falling from that island in slow motion. My heart raced as the memory refreshioned itself in my head. The island was plummeting towards the ground at an alarming speed. The only sound I could hear was the wind rushing and gun shots. My screaming was a mere whisper in all the chaos. I found the parachute just in time and was able to get out. As I jumped off the island I heard a faint shriek from Jimmy.

I watched the island crash into the ground and its final demise. It was too close for comfort. That whole moment costed me my life in a way. Something died in me that day. My innocence and childhood did not escape the island.

I took a deep breath and my ears popped as the plane descended. I gripped tightly onto the armrests and tried to focus on my destination. I'll be home soon. Back with all my bandmates, my friends, my family. I smiled to myself dispite the terror running through my veins as the plane landed. I saw the buildings through the window get larger and closer. In a matter of minutes the plane was on the ground. I sighed with relief that we landed.

I departed from the plane and went to the terminal to collect my belongings. Afterwards, I headed for the closest exit. I would then take a train to Essex. The train was much easier for me than flying. I was so thankful that the people in Japan were so generous or I probably would not have even been able to afford to get here. While I rode the train I borrowed someone's mobile and called Damon.

"Hey Damon!" I cheered into the phone.

"Noodle, where the bloody hell are you?" Damon growled.

I had completely forgot to call Damon and tell him I had found my way to UK. I bit my lip in agony.

"Oh Damon I'm so sorry. I just had to get to England as soon as I could. I caught the quickest plan to London. I'm on my way to Essex."

"I wouldn't even bother if I were you Noodle something happened-"

The connection to the phone was lost. I returned the phone to its owner and sighed. Why wouldn't Damon want me to go back to Kong? What was the worst that could happen? What if it was my vision from earlier? No, no way. I'm just nervous about seeing everyone. I relaxed on the train and looked out the window at the lovely scenery. It was only a matter of time til I was at Essex.

Essex was like a past life when I arrived there. Everything was practically the same. I ran through the city and made my way to Kong. I saw the gates and ran up the hill through all the graves and found myself at a great suprise. Kong was gone. My vision had came true. I screamed in agony. Where was Kong? My dreams of reuniting with the band had burned to ashes just as the building itself.

My hands reached into the ash and grabbed handfuls. I opened my hands and watched the ash fall through my fingers and disperse into the wind. I fell to my knees and cried as I layed in the ash. I wasn't even concerned about getting dirty. The wind blew the ash over me and I just layed there as if I was one of the many bodies in this graveyard. I just wanted to die at that very moment. I lifted my mask to look up at the bright sky. The ash fell into my cuts and I screamed in the agony of both physical and emotional pain. I covered my face again. It just wasn't time. Where were the Gorillaz then?

I left the abandonned place and went to a nearby park. There I pulled out my laptop and looked up the Gorillaz. Everyone had gone their separate ways. I suppose it was time to wait. I used skype to call Damon again. I was sobbing the whole time.

"Damon *sniff* where is everyone? What happened to Kong?" I cried.

"Noodle...Murdoc burned the place down. The rest of the band just went home. I'm sorry you had to find out that way Noodle. If there's anything Ii could-"

"No, it's okay. I think I might go home."

I hung up and then decided maybe I should call my foster home. I called Frank and Jenna and asked them to pick me up at Essex. They were esctatic to know that I was alive and well. They said had searched for a long time only to find that I was Noodle from Gorillaz. I told them about my travels and lived with them until I completed my GED.

I kept in contact with Damon and one day he called me with some news.

"Noodle, it's me Damon. I have some amazing news. I hope you've been practicing your music!" he exclaimed into the phone.

"Yes, but why?" I asked hesitantly.

"I found Murdoc, he's at Plastic Beach with 2D! I can get you a boat ride to the island, Noodle!"

"Of course just tell me when and where."

"One week. We will pick you up at your house and everything."

I hung up with the greatest smile in a long time. Finally, I get to see them again. Everything would be perfect. I began to pack immediately, but a whole week. I told Jenna and Frank about the news and they were happy for me, but at the same time they were sad to see their kid go so soon. The rest of the days I practiced my instruments nonstop. The day finally came.

The car was outside and one of Damon's assistants was at the wheel. Damon also said no one knew I was going to come to the island. It was supposed to be a huge suprise. I got my belongings in the car and we drove to the docks. There I boarded the M. Harriet. My journey had taken off where it last left off.


	9. Chapter 9

**You all should know what happens next, but I'm sure you wanna still here it from here perspective. Lol here you go.**

Before I left, the man gave me a briefcase. He told me where I was going had been a bit dangerous lately. He warned me not to open it though unless it was completely necessary. I was assigned to room 13. There I sat and waited to arrive at Plastic Beach. I was so excited that I would be back with the band after all these years.

I was on the boat for about 2 days and I sat to down to relax as it wouldn't only be another day until I would arrive. I sat promptly as I planned the moment to when I finally arrived. I was so excited. Just then there was a knock on the cabin door. One of the men who worked on the ship came in with a face of fear and horror.

"Madam, the ship is under attack from pirates. I've been sent to escort you to the lifeboats!" he cried in a hurried tone.

I knew automatically what to do. My suitcase was on the side and I opened it. It was a Thompson gun.

"Madam?" questioned the man.

He saw me take out the gun and the man jerked up in surprise.

"Oh, Um- I- oh dear," he stammered as I marched out the door and down the aisle.

I walked out the onto the deck and began shooting at these planes that were swooping down and firing bullets at both me and the ship. I fired endlessly and managed to get one of the planes and watched it crash into the sea. However, the second plane had bombed the ship and caused it to sink at an alarmingly fast pace.

Half of the ship became engulfed in flames and I was forced to abandon ship. I dove into the water and climbed into a lifeboat. I barely made it out of there. I rolled into the lifeboat which managed to have my belongings. Most likely curtesy of the nice man. I gasped and layed in the raft just catching my breath and wondering what could possibly happen next.

I listened to the crashing waves, but then heard something bubbling under me. I got up in suspition and looked in the water. Something huge lifted me up. I looked side to side in curiousity of what it could possibly be. Then I got a better view.

"Russel?" I questioned.

He was a huge giant. I thought at first I was hallucinating. Russel looked up and picked me and the lifeboat off his head. He and I were both looking at each other eye to eye.

"Who are you? How do you know me?" he asked.

"Russel it's me, Noodle," I said as I began to cry.

"Noodle?" he said as a grin formed on his face.

I hadn't been so happy in a long time. He gave a huge (and I mean huge in a strong sense) smile. I wonder if he was on his way to Plastic Beach too.

"Noods, watcha doin' on a lifeboat in da middle of the ocean?" he asked.

"I'm on my way to Plastic Beach, but what about you? Where are you going and why are you so big?" I asked.

"Must've been something I ate," he chuckled.

"How'd you get here?"

"Well, I heard Murdoc was trying to get the band back together. However, he never contacted me about it. I swore you were gone forever, Noods. Anyway, I was so pissed off, man. I mean, I'm the drummer. Anyway I decided I'd swim to the place. I dove off the docks and made a good distance, but ya' know man's gotta eat. So I had fed off stuff that's floated off in the ocean. Stuff was radioactive or somethin' cause I started growing huge. Now I'm livin' large HAHA! So what's you story?"

I told Russel everything. I told him how the whole video was a hoax that Murdoc and I planned. I told him how Murdoc never came for me and I was left all alone. I told him how I was fostered and ran away from home. When I finally ended my story he wore a face of sorrow and discontent. His little girl had gone through so much.

"Oh Noods, you had such a hard life. That damn Murdoc is gonna regret making you go through all that. Now that gives me two reason to break his face. I will carry you the rest of the way to the island. I can't a lady like you wander alone in da middle of the ocean like this. Ain't right. But man, I am sure glad to see ya!"

He scooped me and my belongings from the boat and placed me on top of his head.

"You should get a good view from there Noods. Tell me if you see anything."

I looked out. There was nothing, but sea. Then I heard faint music. It sounded like someone singing. The voice seemed so faint though I could barely hear.

"I hear music from that direction!" I yelled as I pointed ahead.

"Hold your breath," said Russel as he bagan to descend.

I held my breath and held on to his bald head. He dove deep onto the water and swam quickly ahead in the water. The music was louder and he emerged. I let go and stood up. I felt my urge to play along to the music. I grabbed my melodica and Russel scooped me into his hand and held me out to see if I could see any land. I scratched my head and looked out. I got an idea and began to play loudly to see if I could get a response. I heard the lyrics now.

_Distant stars_

_Come in black or red_

_I've seen their worlds_

_Inside my head_

_They connect _

_With the fall of man_

_They breathe you in_

_And dive as deep as they can_

_There's nothing you can do for them_

_They are the force between_

_When the sunlight is arising_

_There's nothing you can say to him_

_He is an outer heart_

_And the space has been broken_

_Broken_

_Our love_

_Broken_

I began to play my melodica loudly to the song. Russel just listened. He wasn't sure what I was doing, but he didn't seem to mind. He went along with it. I wasn't sure either.

_Broken_

_Our love_

_Broken_

_Is it far away in the _

_Glitter Freeze_

_Or in our eyes_

_Every time they leave_

_It's by the light_

_Of the plasma screens_

_We keep switched on_

_All through the night while we sleep_

_There's nothing you can do for them_

_They are the force between_

_When the sunlight is arising_

_There's nothing you can say to her_

_I am without a heart_

_And the space has been broken_

_Broken_

_Our love_

_Broken _

I paused and heard a plane. I looked and saw the plane dive. I ducked and so did Russel. I looked at him and nodded to let him know I was okay. He grinned and I turned back to the ocean. I began to play. The singing stopped, but the music kept going. The sun finally disappeared along the horizon and I just stopped. I was overcome by some strange feeling. I felt so unsure, but I was happy. I found Russel. Hopefully, I would get to the island soon. I just couldn't wait.

Just a bit further and I would be back on the island... Finally my real home... my real family... and I could be the real me...


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks to all the readers and fans who have given me support and asked for updates throughout my story. Keep it up! :D**

I awoke the next morning to find that I was on top of Russel's giant cranium. I sat up and looked across to see tht we were approaching the island. It was morning according to the light orange peaking up from the horizon and that Russel made breakfasr from a hammerhead shark he found in the ocean.

As he bit the shark in half, I could not help, but shudder at the way he gruesomely ate the fearful beast. I looked at the horizon to see a small island of trash?

"Russel, look?" I cried.

Russel look and saw the island. He ran through the water as we approached the island, we saw that it was under some kind of attack. I stood on top of Russel's head as I felt the urgency to attack, but then Russel picked me up.

"Russel, what the he-?"

"Noodle, this is dangerous. I'm gonna hide ya in my mouth okay?"

I looked at Russel. He knew I was capable of taking care of myself so I knew this was serious. I nodded my head as he opened his mouth and climbed inside. He closed his mouth and I immediately felt sick. It smelt like chum in there and held my breath. I heard muffled sounds under his breathing. Gunshots and screams sounded in the background.

Crashing water and the familiar sound of crushing metal overcame the sound. I held my breath and tried to hold still. I gasped for air and took another deep breath before holding it again. Unable to hold my breath much long I pried Russel's mouth open and came out. I lifted my mask to see a younger me and Murdoc.

Murdoc looked at me as if he saw a ghost. I wouldn't blame him. He probably thought I was dead. I jumped from Russel's mouth and walked towards Murdoc. The carbon copy of myself stepped in from of me as if she was telling me to back off.

I looked at her. I felt an evil presense in her and she knew I was onto her. She glared at me and I glared back and looked at Murdoc.

"Cyborg, back down. These are friends of mine," Murdoc said with a sly grin.

She stepped aside with a slight sense of remorse in it. He walked to me with his usual swagger and put his arm around me.

"Cyborg, get me and my chaps some rum," Murdoc ordered the robot.

I pushed Murdoc's arm off of me. He must've been horny as hell without any real women on the island, but still I didn't feel comfortable with that. Murdoc grinned again as he walked around me. He was checking me out!

"It's been so long, Noods. You've grown up so much," he said.

"5 years," I responded.

"Wot in hell's name happened to your face though?"

I grinded my teeth and clenched my fists. I even heard Russel grind his teeth behind me.

"What happend to my face? You really want to know? Remember El Mañana? When I jumped off that island the parachute was blown close to the last explosion and burning debris hit my bloody face! And you know what? I stayed around that damn crashsite for several days waiting for you to come and find mind. Suprise! You never did! I collapsed in the freakin' wilderness and was put in a foster home. This scar ruined me Murdoc!

I had to be homeschooled because people constantly harassed me about my appearance! I had to hide with this mask for years! And what's worse is the hell I went to get here! I got attacked by pirates on my way here!"

I grabbed Murdoc by the collar of his shirt and yanked him close so I could look him dead in the eye. I grinded my teeth together and let all the hatred collect together. I felt it literally run through my veins. The adrenaline inside me fueled it and I lifted my fist getting ready to beat the crap out of him.

I heard fast-paced steps charging at me. It was the cyborg and I dropped Murdoc to avoid an further problems.

"You know what Murdoc? Despite the hell you put me through, I'm going to forgive you because by traveling the world alone I learned whaat it was really like. I learned what regular people did and that's when I realized that I just wasn't one of them. I'm Noodle and I'm the guitarist for Gorillaz."

Murdoc got up and made a hault gesture to the cyborg and she stopped.

"I'm very happy to see you're back Noodle. Nobody could replace you," said Murdoc as he shooed away the cyborg.

I sighed and looked at him. I took another deep breath and hugged him.

"I actually missed you Murdoc," I said.

Murdoc hugged me back. I wasn't sure why I forgave him so quickly. It was all true, but this was what I had to do. Mr. Kyuzo had told me that. There was still someone missing and I looked up and pulled away from Murdoc.

"Where's 2D?" I asked.

"Face-ache? He's in his room. You can take the elevator to see him. He's not used to visitors so be easy HAHA no go in and scare him if you want. That whale has him scared stiff," Murdoc answered.

"Ya' mean da whale I tossed away?" asked Russel.

I walked into the building while he and Murdoc started to argue. It was like old times. They hadn't changed. Was it just me who changed? I still felt unsure of myself and I walked through the entrance of the building. I was in Murdoc's study and I stepped into a crude elevator. B2 had the label that read "2D's Room" on it. I pressed the button and it lit up. I listened to the elevator music as I felt myself descend. The door opened and I quietly walked in.

The doors had made a horrible creaking sound and I looked at a clock in his room. It was 6pm already? I was suprised. 2D was about to take a bunch of pills. Aspirin, painkillers, everything he probably had. He dropped ll of them on the floor when he heard me come in. I had covered my face with the mask because believe it or not I didn't want to scare him.

He looked at me and walked up to me. 2D looked like he was feeling sick. His eyes were red and heavy as if he had already taken a ton of pills. He was in some kind of shock and probably thought I was a hallucination. He reached out and touched me.

"2D?" I asked.

"Who are you?" he asked me with his hazy gaze.

He looked like he was going to collapse. My heart shattered to see him like this. I felt like I could compare with his pain now. I felt a strong sympathy for him and then smiled under my mask.

"It's me, Noodle," I said.


	11. Chapter 11

**To anyone who wants to know what happens after this will have to go to my other story "Plastic Beach Romancing". When I write stories they are usual scenarios that could take place. The ending for this story is actually the beginning of another. Thank you. I felt it would be neccessary if it led to the other story, but if anyone wants me to continue the story from Noodle's or even 2D's narration I will be more than happy to do so.**


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